Vote for Quince
Wednesday, October 27, 2004 17:18:16
For citizens of the United States, the hotly-contested 2004 election is less than a week away. Instead of diluting your moral principles by voting for one of the cretins candidates on the ballot, write in a vote for Jonathan Quince.
Here is my mini-platform:
- The Top Line: A strong national defense; uncompromising prosecution of the War on Terrorism; a military solution to terrorism. If you are a single-issue voter, this should be your issue.
- Foreign policy: A strong regard for America's national self-interest and national security; uncompromisingly strong support for Israel; a hard line against that corrupt club of tin-pot dictators known as the “United Nations”, and possible withdrawal from that organization on moral grounds; vigorous enforcement of American policy on rogue states. (This includes finishing what President Bush started in Iraq and entering into other similar wars if necessary.)
- Economic policy: Lower taxes, more economic freedom, less governmental involvement in the economy. Immediate repeal of the capital gains and estate taxes; immediate drastic reduction and rapid phasing-out of the personal income tax; restructuring, simplification, and reduction of corporate taxes, with a focus on taking pressure off small business; reduction of the Federal government to a fraction of its current size and rededication of the Federal government to its Constitutionally mandated functions (e.g., military, foreign policy, currency, function as arbiter between the States, etc.).
- Science and technology: Uncompromising support for (and non-interference with) cutting-edge research, including stem cell research; a complete reform of the patent system.
- Internet: Death penalty for spammers. (Seriously. Make spamming a “Darwin's Law” offense. And every spam run crosses state lines, so it is indeed a Federal offense.) If they've made it onto ROKSO or similar lists, fry 'em.
- Tobacco Policy: Use powers under the Ninth and Fourteenth Amendments to force permanent suspension of anti-tobacco policies nationwide. This includes drastic lowering or complete elimination of confiscatory taxes currently levied on cigarettes and other tobacco products. This also includes enforcing the right of private establishments such as restaurants to allow or disallow smoking as the proprietors see fit, rather than as dictated by the Nanny State.
- Education: Federal intervention in education has failed. Totally disband the current Federal education regime. (To all the New Math and Whole Language nitwits and the bureaucrats who support them: “You're all fired!” God, I have wanted to say that for years.) Temporarily replace it to prevent chaos, but see the “Constitution Updating Party” item for an idea as to whether the Federal government will remain involved at all.
- First Amendment: Uncompromising support for freedom of speech, including freedom of sexual expression. Removal of obscenity laws nationwide. Repeal of laws that single out the pornography and sexual entertainment industries for harassment.
- Second Amendment: Support for the right to keep and bear arms, a right Constitutionally protected for the people. (Update: Since it is an issue of great importance, I must explicitly mention that this includes uncompromising support for the personal right to self-defense and use of force in defense of life, limb, and property.)
- Ninth Amendment: Duh.
- Tenth Amendment and Federalism: A shrinking of Federal control exercised over the States. Stop abuse of the Interstate Commerce Clause. Stop bullshit like the tricks used to raise the drinking age to 21 nationally.
- Federal Enforcement of the Bill of Rights: Use of both Executive powers and pressure on Congress to vigorously enforce the Bill of Rights (viz., Amendments One through Ten) on the States and lower governments. This is allowed by the Fourteenth Amendment.
- Constitution Updating Party: Sure, the Constitution is a bit behind the times. Changing times have altered the balance on many points of policy; and issues like the Interstate Highway System, NASA, and the Internet just didn't exist when the Framers put it together. But the Framers did know this would happen, which is why the Constitution has built-in processes for amendment. In that light, movements should be started towards amending the Constitution to bring it up-to-date; and a strict deadline should be set beyond which all Federal functions not mentioned in the Constitution will immediately cease if new Amendments do not allow their continued existence.
- Prostitution Policy: Use of Executive privilege to immediately suspend all anti-prostitution laws nationwide (excepting laws against forced prostitution or child prostitution, which violate other laws anyway) and fire all vice squads from police forces. Payment of compensatory damages to prostitutes who have had assets seized.
- Drug policy: Three-tiered approach:
- Decriminalize possession of drugs for personal use. Continue to strongly encourage education about the harmful effects of drugs.
- Strictly regulate the manufacture and distribution of currently-illicit drugs. Institute price controls to keep the cost of drugs down, and thus to slice the profit margins of recreational drug manufacturing razor-thin. Overall, Federal policy should regulate the quality and quantity of output while strictly discouraging profiteering off of newly-licit drugs.
- Destroy the organized crime elements who currently profit from drug illegality. This requires international action, including U.S. military intervention on foreign soil if necessary. The drug lords (and corrupt governments who support them) rake in billions of dollars each year from the drug racket, and they must be liquidated with extreme prejudice.
- Given the magnitude of the current drug problem, drug policy must be handled by the Federal government as a matter of the general welfare. However, the end-goal is to roll back Federal involvement over the long term by eventually making drugs into a “non-issue”. (Nobody cares about the fruit if it isn't forbidden.)
- Death To Lawyers Act: Complete reform of the criminal and civil justice systems, with a special focus on making the system more accessible to pro-se representation. Death to lawyers (or at least unemployment).
- John Kerry Policy: Executive order revoking Kerry's citizenship and deporting him and his family to the Eighth Circle of Hell.
- .…and much more….
- The Bottom Line: More personal and individual freedom at home; more security, domestically and internationally; and justice above all.
If, however, you must make the bifurcated choice for a major-party candidate, consider which candidate is less far away from the above. (Hint: Kerry it ain't.)
This is a joint message of the Committee to Elect Jonathan Quince, the Alliance Against the Abomination Known as John Kerry, and the Social Order for the Physical Enjoyment of Females. Political donations amounting to $0.00 were provided by our corporate overlords at Oligarch Corporation.
Update 2004-11-01: My core constituency has spoken! With only one day left until the election, I update my platform with important points regarding rights of land ownership.
Update 2004-11-02: Read up on some more of my campaign promises before you go to the polls.